As many of you have probably noticed(and some of you not so much) I have not written a blog in quite some time. Like four months or so. Apologies are in order for both you the reader, and to myself the writer(or non-writer as of late). Every week for the past four months I have promised myself that I would write a blog. And every week for the past four months I have broken that promise. It has not been for a lack of desire. And it has not been because I have been too busy. I sit down to do it, and just can't. I make up excueses even when I have none. Call it writer's block. Lately I have been really having a strenuous time mentally and emotionally dealing with some issues. Don't get me wrong, I am glad to be here in Hollywood doing the work I am. I really do feel like this is where I am supposed to be for the time being. I think that a lot of my problems have to deal with the stark contrast between my life six months ago and my life today. Six months ago it was a 45 minute walk to the nearest town; now I can get to five different pawn shops in less than a ten minute walk. Six months ago I was watching bootleg screener movies that I could buy for twenty cents a pop; now I live a stone's throw from where some of these same ones were filmed. Six months ago the toughest food decision was what can we cook with tomato and onion sauce; now its which of the 500 grocery stores or fast-food chains do I want to buy from. Six months ago I could go outside and hear only the birds and wind; today I fall asleep to the lullabys of ghetto birds(police helicopters) and angry chihuahuas. Six months ago I lived in a land where a person would give one of his last dollars to another in need; today I live in a county that has upwards of 80,000 persons without a constant roof under which to sleep. (As well as over 262,000 millionaires.) Six months ago I knew high school students who said that they would die to live in the America; today I live in a city where they do. I felt like Kenya was a land of optimists. Things may be bad now, but we have it better than some, and tomorrow will be better. If you focused on the hardships, you would drown in the questions of "Why us?" Today I feel like now I live in a land of entitlement. "I deserve this even though I have done nothing to deserve it." "I have so many resources available to me, but I will ignore them and complain about how I deserve a better life" In short; much of the world has little and can make the most of it, yet another portion of humanity has much and turns it into so little. This culture shift has really been playing with my mind lately. I realize that this post has been kind of a downer, but hey I was able write something at last. I want to make this a habit. If I have not written a post in over two weeks, please email, facebook, or call me and tell me to write something, if not for your sake then at least for my own sake.
Over and out,
Josh
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It's about time... good grief! Okay, okay I'll take it easier on you.
ReplyDeleteThis post came as perfect timing for me. I just spent the last three days in New York City trying to live more like a resident than a tourist. Now in my past, I had a bigger budget for a trip to NYC because it was a vacation. This time, I expected it to be cheaper.
The truth is that the city thrives on stuff. I NEED to have this $400 + stroller for my child to SURVIVE in the city. I NEED to have these designer shoes if I ever want a chance at that job. Yadda, yadda.
I'm normally immuned to these influences, but not this time. I felt them tugging at me.
I hope you can stay immuned to Hollywood as well. And remember, you can only offer a way for help and change. You can't force it.
It's been a week. Tell us something.
ReplyDeleteI hear you. I wonder if the complexity of culture allows us to close our eyes to our neighbors. Or maybe we don't even need much excuse for that.
You're welcome anytime at my place if you want to make a tomato and onion sauce with chapo. It's still a staple.